I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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