I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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