I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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