my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
