I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
