I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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