so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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