Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
