Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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