...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
