butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
