the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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