....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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