I am in a vortex of obligation.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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