I can tuck mytits in my pants
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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