Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
