why didn't you poke me back
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
