okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
You need Xanax blowdarts
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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