I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
