I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
She needs sedatives and a leash
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
wow bdsm is so cute
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