party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
