You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
3 2 1 whiskey
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize