OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
