**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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