I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
