Texts From Last Night · salimom's Favorites

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salimom's Favorites Texts:

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(319): View more from Iowa

Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?

(1-319): View more from Iowa

Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.

(319): View more from Iowa

Thanks bro

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(204): View more from Manitoba

New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!

(860): View more from Connecticut

I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo

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(812): View more from Indiana

Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.

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