Texts From Last Night · chat2639's Favorites

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chat2639's Favorites Texts:

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(773): View more from Illinois

You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.

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(212): View more from New York

at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver

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(815): View more from Illinois

If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like

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(210): View more from Texas

It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.

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(519): View more from Ontario

We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents

(1-519): View more from Ontario

I'm down.

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