me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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