bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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