dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
if i died would you start the facebook group?
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
