her vagine was all disorganized.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
