Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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