You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
My vagina just clenched in fear
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