I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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