"it" just moved
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
