Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
