I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
