I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
