i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
