She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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