i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
