I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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