We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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