So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Randomize
