Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
