I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
