you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
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