we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
