so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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