She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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